Vile Murderous Hatred

...
M: "So where are you?"
M: "I've got the window open."
M: "Which one?"
M: "The XYZ window..."
M: "Hmmm. I don't have that on mine mayb"
M: "What do you mean you don't have that window??? It's right there."
M: "Well I'm running the same OS but the customiz...nevermind. I found what you're talking about. OK, what do you see?"
M: "Option A - yadda yadda yadda..."
M: "OK goo"
M: "Option B - yadda yadda yadda..."
M: "No that's g"
M: "Option C - yadda yadda yadda..."
M: "OK!!! Are you listening to me at all?"
M: "Those are all the options."
M: "*sigh* Hit cancel."
M: "OK, I've removed option A."
M: "Nonono! Cancel!"
M: "What?? What do you mean? I removed it!"
M: "No, CANCEL."
M: "There is no cancel!"
M: "Yes there is! At the bottom of the dialog!"
M: "Oh! Well why didn't you say so? OK, I've cancelled it."
M: "Not now! Go back and add option A again."
M: "Why did you have me cancel then???"
M: "I am shoving a cactus up my anus and it feels rather nice in comparison to this."
M: "OK, I added option A again."
M: "Now perform action 3."
M: "I did, nothing happened."
M: "Oh that's because you must have made error x. It happens a lot."
M: "No I didn't."
M: "You must have. Let me explain. When you try to perform action 3, error x happens i"
M: "Don't explain to me! I didn't make a mistake! Fix it!"
M: "But I"
M: "Why do you not want to help me?!"
M: "What are you smoking?! Error X logically entails your having made a mistake!"
M: "I CAN'T STAND THIS! IF YOU DON'T WANT TO HELP ME THEN I'M NOT GOING TO TALK TO YOU ANYMORE!"
M: "What the holy high shit of FUCKnuts do you THINK I was doing? Spilling the blood of your viriginal daughter on the grave of your ancestors?"
M: "I DON'T WANT YOUR HELP IF YOU WON'T HELP ME. I'M TRYING TO DO WHAT YOU'RE TELLING ME TO DO!"
M: "It's not about whether you're trying or not! You're doing something wrong and I'm tryi"
M: *click*
M: "ng to tell you what the program is doing so that you understand why you THINK you may not have done anything wrong but the unintuitive interface is...why are you not screaming at me? Hello? Hello?"
...

Does anybody have any viriginal daughters they'd like dead? I'm really in the mood right now. I promise to rape their eye sockets before I submit them to blunt force trauma with a two by four, finally disemboweling them. I need some(some) graves of ancestors too. And supersize that motherfucker.

Disclaimer: The preceding thoughts and events are ALL REALLY REAL. I was not using hyperbole AT ALL. This passage is SOOOOOO not sarcastic. I am SOOOOOOO serious. I have a thing for two by fours.