Monday, March 20, 2006

Did You Mean "I'm Retarded"?

Oh come ON. said Monday it had modified the way its search engine handles queries for the term "abortion" after receiving an e-mail complaint that the results appeared biased.

Until the recent change, a user who visited the Seattle internet retailer and typed in the word "abortion" received a prompt asking, "Did you mean adoption?" followed by search results for "abortion."

That's just lame. If I search for my name on Google, it usually asks me if I mean "leukemia" instead. Should I be up in arms that Google thinks I am somehow related to that terrible disease? That's a rhetorical question but let me just make it clear: NO! The programs are just trying to help. Since when have we started taking programmed responses personally?

And besides, people spell poorly enough as it is online and I imagine many have been brought to their senses after being prompted by Amazon to consider abortion pills rather than adoption pills. And just what is so insulting about mixing up "abortion" and "adoption" anyway? It makes no sense really:

Girl1: You know, I think I'm going to get an abortion.
Girl2: I've never heard it said like that "get an adoption".
Girl1: Double U Tea Eff?! Abortion. That doesn't even sound like adoption.
Girl2: Oh ok then you're a spawn of Satan. Cosmos at 9 at the Liquid Lounge?


Girl1: You know, I think I'm going to get an abortion.
Girl2: I think you should consider an adoption instead.
Girl1: ...I want an ABORTION. I do not WANT a child.
Girl2: So why don't you adopt?
Girl1: Because I DO NOT WANT A CHILD, which adoption would give me. What is wrong with you you mentally challenged piece of discarded bacon bit from a dumpster?!

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